so simple,

yet so true.

Well, it's officially Thanksgiving...

on this Thanksgiving at 1am, i am truly thankful for a lot.

to keep my tradition of lists that i like so much, here are just a few of the highlights:

~ God. this may sound like an easy answer, but even though i am barely beginning to understand just how thankful i should be, i am already overwhelmed.
~ coming back home to a family who is really happy that you're home
~ a school where i can learn and grow without being surrounded by blatent discouragement
~ an amazing boyfriend who teaches me everyday about seeking God with each step you take
~ wonderful friends, especially my encouraging, supportive, strong roommate
~ treatments and developments for arthritis....really.

and in keeping with the quote i put up about being thankful for little things, here are a few:

~ tonight. i had such a good time with old high school friends having dinner and hanging out at dozier's house...in the past, this has been somewhat awkward, but tonight was really so much fun and i had a darn good time playing knock-out. (and happy birthday to dozier, by the way)
~ friends like ben and aj, who make my face hurt by keeping me laughing for literally hours.
~ fall. as i was coming down my driveway this afternoon, it was beautiful.
~ starbucks in the fall/wintertime. yes, this is definitely small, but boy am i thankful.
~ movies that make me cry, because they teach me more about myself

anyways, i think that's all i can think of -- i'm pretty drained from writing my research paper for the past few days, then sleeping few hours and driving home. wow. time for bed!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! i am thankful that you're reading this :)

he who does not thank for little...

will not thank for much. --estonian proverb

it's chilly and rainy outside

and that pretty much defines my week. (all two days of it...wow, that's bad)

this afternoon, i am thankful for thanksgiving itself.

for time off from school,
for a good family,
for the fact that i even get a thanksgiving meal, and a good one at that,
for time to see old friends,
and time to simply relax.

thinking about this, i can really start to feel better about this rainy week.

i don't have much time...

i have a meeting in 10 minutes for my management case study group.

today has been a long, tiring, dull, somewhat crappy day to be quite honest.

my morning didn't start off to well, and my afternoon wasn't much better. on the positive side, pascal told us this morning that we wouldn't be having any more water aerobics classes this semester, so that was nice because it gives me more time in the mornings for work and study, and also lets me take a long shower, which i sure can't complain about.

i am trying to learn how to balance friendships and not get walked on, an interesting concept.

i know that we are supposed to be totally giving, selfless, patient, and kind to everyone, but on days like today, i feel like the only time i'm needed is when i can be of service and that hurts my feelings. i've struggled with this before and tried to figure out if Jesus was walked on, and i guess he definitely was. i know it probably sounds ignorant that i don't know these things, but i am really looking for the right answers.

let me know if you have any insight into this, because it's a pattern in my life, so i know something needs to change.

hmmm...

good point.

what a long, blurry week it has been....

you know what i mean by blurry? for example, all day on monday i was thinking it was wednesday. that is the start of a blurry week, my friends.

and i guess it didn't really help that jeanna and i stayed up literally all night on tuesday night trying to get as much done as possible for our yearbook deadline on wednesday morning at 8:30. i've never actually pulled an "all-nighter" and i don't think i ever will again, b/c it didn't work out too well for my classes on wednesday....but, hey - it'll be a good yearbook for sure.

it's been a rough week, quite honestly. the end of the semester always does bring rough weeks, since so much is due at one time and you really just can't wait until exam week to get it all over with. but, i'm closer now than i was 5 days ago, so i shouldn't complain. i have a paper to turn in on wednesday and when that's over, although i still have another paper and some small projects, i will feel homefree.

my arthritis is really mad at me right now for 1) stressing myself, 2) using my hand so much and probably 3) staying up all night on tuesday. so it has decided to attack my right hand, which hasn't been done since i was about 7 or 8 years old. so that was a nice addition to the week also. but, i went and got a complete set of new medication yesterday since i was running out of some, and i can feel the difference a little more today in my hand, so that's good news. just keep that in your prayers, b/c you really don't realize how much you use your hands until you really just can't anymore....

but anyway, i'm going to run to the p.o. right now, then probably do some work for awhile this afternoon before meeting jeff tonight in garner. we have to get a wedding present for our friends we worked with in cali this summer, jenn and dan, who are getting married tomorrow in asheboro. :) so, i will be headed to that wedding tomorrow after the terrorist strikes campbell university at 7:30am. (yes, i'm serious...they are staging a national emergency here at campbell tomorrow morning with full emergency response, media - including me, the fbi, some terrorists, and so on...oh, the excitement) so that's the story of this week...i really couldn't go back through what all happened since, like i said before, it's been a blurry week.

but hey, thanksgiving is this week, followed by last week of class, exams/my 21st birthday, home for CHRISTMAS!! i don't mind exams with a line-up like that.

and by the way, if anyone feels the need, they can purchase the new marc broussard cd "carencro" for my birthday. i love this music...wow.

and i want to take dance lessons...something i've decided since last week's cell group outing to "shall we dance." really, something i've always wanted to do, but dang, i don't have much time left. :)

happy thanksgiving :)

"dream as if you'll live forever...

...live as if you'll die today." thanks, james dean, for your inspiration from my wall every morning when i wake up.

Boo.

well, i just found out that my pictures don't show up on here. oh well.

in other news, i don't have anything due tomorrow, so i don't know what to do with myself. i think i'll try to start getting ready for exams. (yes, people, i'm serious. i am all about getting some good grades. i am also all about not studying on my 21st birthday, which happens to fell the day before two big exams during exam week.)

yeah, i think i'll do that.

happy tuesday night!

can't help myself

oooooh, and this one too:



mary, jenn, makayla, and i. this is right after we ran in the absolutely freezing cold ocean in march.

everything about panama city last year makes me smile from ear to ear. :)

i should have gone to that time management seminar...

i am so amazed that i'm still awake right now. i slept for about 4.5 hours last night, yet i still sit here on this blog when i could be in bed. buuut, i guess that's college at it's best.

i am really in a great mood tonight. why? i don't know. all i've been working on for the past 24 hours has been my research paper and my arthritis is really taking it's toll on me right now. i think it's the weather...it can't decide what it wants to do yet and therefore my joints can't either.

but tonight, i think i will just list a few things that made me happy today and throw some pictures on the end that also make me really happy just to look at.

hmmm....

#1) tonight was cell group potluck. the food was overflowing, and you know potluck food is always good. it was good, clean fun. (just like the KOA slogan...only with a "k" for "klean")

#2) every week at cell group, the girls never cease to amaze me with their fruit-related refreshments. since we're doing the "fruit of the spirit" Bible study, they bring in something fruity each week. this week? definitely bojangle's bo-berry biscuits.....and they were still hot! wow. props go out to rachael and lindsay on that one. and just being involved in cell group each week brings my great joy and happiness.

#3) my roommate is the greatest. i can share anything and everything with her in all ranges of subjects. that's really difficult to find, especially b/c you never know what's going to come out of my mouth and yet somehow it's always a good time in jones 102. :)

#4) today in world lit, our teacher informed us that there is a place where the gates of hell are in sunnyvale, california. that's where buffy the vampire slayer takes place. that's what makes class worthwhile for zach and me.

and here are a few pictures that really made me happy when i looked back at them tonight:


melinda, me, heather, and shannon at "the motion" show at the brewery...check andrew out in the back behind shannon....he's so hot right now?!?!


mal and i in california pretending to be sick since we were the only ones brave enough to keep riding roller coasters at the boardwalk. oh, how i love cali.


and my all-time favorite picture by the train tracks in raleigh. betty, heather, shannon, me, kelly, katie, and jodi before spring formal last year. :)

soooo, that's about it i think. i guess maybe i should go to bed and stop playing on the computer. goodnight!

the power of a moment

thank you chris rice for reminding me of this while getting ready for church this morning:

"you know the number of my days
so come paint Your pictures on the canvas in my head
and come write Your wisdom on my heart
and teach me the power of a moment
the power of a moment, the power of a moment."

(for those of you who won't take a second to read the linked lyrics...)

"it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...."

i'm feeling like writing a little bit tonight

i know you're saying "riiiight, a little bit? michelle? no way."

you're probably right, but here goes nothing....

it's been a pretty good weekend so far. friday night we surprised jeff at five star restaurant in raleigh. it's a nice chinese place we went to for formal last year. even after an hour or more of traffic on i-40, everyone finally made it to the restaurant for dinner. the surprise wasn't really as i planned, but it was still a good time and i think everyone enjoyed it. then we went to see "the incredibles." we were originally going to see "ray" but it had already started. but that was a cute little movie so it was fun too. also, tonight linds and i saw online that yesterday was the first day of "the incredibles," so we saw it on opening night...pretty exciting if you ask me. ha.

today was busy, yet relaxing. i had a lot that i needed to get done, and i did pretty well. this morning i got up and went to the yearbook office and worked with jeanna and kacie for awhile. i got done a few spreads that really needed to be done, so i'm glad for that. i don't want to get anyone's hopes way up, but i can say with confidence that this yearbook is going to be a good one. good cover, good theme, good dedication, good layouts so far. that's enough for me. :)

then i proceeded to eat lunch in the room and work on my research paper for world lit due on monday. yes, i'm a slacker. but i already had the general outline and everything, so i've been working and it's coming along. once i start writing tomorrow, those 7 pages will be done before i know it. i mean, really, i can practically write 7 pages on here without even thinking, so i should be good to go.

and our lady camels won the a-sun championship tonight (as stated below), so that was really exciting. then there was starbucks. and it was good.

i'm really looking forward to thanksgiving and Christmas breaks this year. i am really getting to where i enjoy being home. especially Christmas. it's my very favorite time of year. my birthday and Christmas are in the same month, so i've always really been fond of december, even though the cold is not my choice weather.

i also love autumn. i've become so much more aware of the environment this year. i think it really started in california because it was so beautiful you couldn't help but thank God for your surroundings. and this school year i've really enjoyed just being outside and the leaves changing colors and the fresh air. i'm so thankful for that realization, because i've always just overlooked it.

oh yes - and yesterday, i rode my bike to the post office. three cheers for that. :)

did i mention my life is incredibly random? weird, strange, funny, interesting things happen to me everyday. actually, i'm quite sure that God arranges each one of those things for my amusement because i can't stop laughing at the way things happen sometimes. and the funny thing is that i just keep going. that's how i know they are prearranged, becuase i think if they weren't, i might just go crazy. :)

anyway, i think it's time for bed. goodnight everyone....i hope you had a wonderful weekend!

Go Camels!!

our women's soccer team won the atl sun conference championship tonight against UCF in a shoot-out.....3-1. WAY TO GO CAMELS!!!



BIG congrats to #20 danielle hange and #9 pam sharp.
i love you guys! :)

can't stop thinking about it

i can't help but put this on here too; it sums up life:

"the more we take, the less we become" - sarah mclachlan

the unhappiest times in my life have been when i've been focused on myself. totally "selfish and ungrateful," as one friend used to call her blog.

thinking about this, then, i think about how selfish and ungrateful i still am and how it hurts to be kind and selfless to those who are not in return. life is so hard....i'm so glad that's not all there is to look forward to. and we wonder why suicide rates are so high.....there is no point to life besides spreading God's word.

i was thinking about it during the play "into the woods." there is a scene where a married couple (who have obviously lived in a mediocre marriage for years) are in the woods together and suddenly realize all the reasons they actually fell in love in the first place, and all because of the enchanted woods. it was really sad to me. when you get married it will (hopefully) be to the person who is your very best friend in the whole world and whose faults are totally okay with you and who you can't think of living without. this makes me extremely happy. then i think of living with one person for the rest of my life and how many times i will say something that hurts their feelings and vice versa. i mean, really, what's the point? humans have faults. if that is the very best love you could ever experience in life and yet you were repeatedly hurt by it, i can't see a point to living at all. God's love is so much greater and is totally dependable. how exciting is that?

"never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." -hebrews 13:5

grace, faith, hope. wouldn't (truly) live without them.

so much to say, so much to say...

i've had a lot on my mind lately.

i'm not really "worried" about my future, but just wondering what opportunities to take and which not to take in order to get to where i'm going. i know wherever that is, it will be a ministry no matter what it is and i also know that it will be great, but i'm just trying to take steps in the right direction.

however, i am doing so much better in school than i have since i've been in college, which is pretty amazing because i am still pretty involved in other things here at campbell and at church and even outside, with family and with (boy)friend. :) but it all seems to just balance out nicely for once, and i know that it is because i do what i need to do instead of procrastinating around. i know that i need to get things done, so i go ahead and take care of them right away. it's wonderful. (if you're reading this, you probably know it already, but i'm just figuring these things out...) i don't want to jinx myself, but i think that if i try really, really hard during exams, i can come out with all a's this semester, which will be a first since early-high school times. wow.

i also know that it is because i have been praying about that, and God has taken care of it by giving my more desire to do my work and to learn in general. that's good stuff.

jeff and i talked about that the other day...it's so amazing that i can feel my priorities changing. and that really doesn't bother me at all. for example, i was originally going to stay in chapel hill for halloween on sunday night and drive home monday morning before my 11:00 class. but i had a few tests and a paper due this week and i really felt like i would rather come back and study so that i could prepare for cell group on monday and also so that my week wouldn't be off from the get-go. i wanted to come back here and get all my stuff put back together before i had to start the school week. i'm sure unc would have been fun and i certainly would have enjoyed more time with jeff, but we figure - hey, we're in college right now and we need to do what we need to do. i used to think that this meant i was turning into an old person, but i'm really glad i'm not so focused on being in the middle of all the "action" anymore because it was only stressful.

i'm feeling pretty down tonight. for starters, my car battery died tonight, so i had to leave my car in the mckay parking lot so that i can go get it jumped in the morning and buy a new battery. but that's not even a huge deal, just not real fun either. but also tonight, we had "trash night" for cia. it makes me really sad that when we have an outreach for "Christians in action" only 3 girls and 3 guys show up, of those being linds, nick, ike, and me who are all leaders. i don't really know what to say about except that it makes me sad that so many people come to learn but they don't put it into action when given the chance. i know many of them are involved in ministries elsewhere which is a good thing. i just hope that everyone is using their talent somewhere. i wish that everyone could experience the joy that i have found in the small things like this outreach.

i have also felt very hurt lately about my friendships. i have tried so hard to mend friendships from home that were broken before i came to school and not to hold grudges. i think that has worked out fairly well, because i can't think of anyone at home that i'm on bad terms with and i have really come to peace with all of that and God has worked those things out. now it seems like i have very few people i can actually depend on here at school, which is a little upsetting at times. i think that God is showing me that people will always let you down. it's a hard way to learn though when you feel like things are happening and you're growing away from some and you don't even know why that began in the first place or what you're supposed to do about it.

it's funny: sometimes i get on here and type a few sentences and i'm good to go. other times, it's like this where i just can't even stop the flow. but i really need to - i have this case study i need to do for organizational management and i could really use some sleep.

please let me know what you think about any of this. thanks so much!

Election 2004

Yes, I am the proud owner of one of these stickers (without the "touchscreen" part, of course). I'm happy to say I put in my vote today at the Buies Creek Fire Department. Lindsay and I are now printing out US maps so we can fill in the red and blue states as they come up tonight....hahaha.

LET'S GO GEORGIE!!!

Shout-out to my friend Rachel in Santa Barbara, CA for wearing her "George W. Bush is my homeboy" shirt today, even though she could be killed for that at her school. :)